Bowl of Joe - 'Cause a cup just aint enough

Flash Movie Review - Dog Soldiers

2007-08-13T19:38:00.000-07:00

Dog Soldiers on DVD was this weekend's newly discovered horror gem. Director Neil Marshall (The Descent) managed to take an easy-to-screw-up genre flick and actually pull off something clever and very entertaining. The story is about a squad of British soldiers on what they believe is a routine training maneuver in the Scottish wilderness. The training exercise quickly degrades into a fight for survival when the soldiers are almost slaughtered by a pack of werewolves.

Taking the approach of creating a tight knit, and believable group of characters and throwing them into an unbelievable, and probably unwinnable, situation actually gave me something to care about. I found myself tensing up and shouting "no!" when any of the charming Britts found themselves disemboweled. The film's other strength is its comedy. While no Shaun of the Dead farce, Dog Soldiers does have several moments where it capitalizes on the absurdity of fighting against 7' tall unkillable wolfmen. I won't spoil any of the slapstick except to say that you should keep your eye on the character called "spoon" (short for Witherspoon -ed.)

For a movie with a small budget (nary a frame of CGI) and a mostly unknown cast (at least in America), Dog Soldiers is a surprising offering. While it might not add any new elements to werewolf lore, this movie is an excellent entry in an underrepresented horror genre.

Buffalo Soldier

2007-07-25T13:56:00.000-07:00

On my drive home a few days ago, I was listening to the radio. It was a sunny, breezy day so I had the windows rolled down and the music turned up. Whenever the radio is on I have to sing. I’m sure it’s annoying to any unlucky passenger that might find themselves my unwilling audience, but I was alone and therefore free to wail. I wasn’t in the mood for Hoochie-pop and I needed something I could sing along with, so I tuned the dial to an easy listening/adult contemporary station. Come on now, don’t pretend that you don’t have at least one of those channels on your presets.

Anyway, the next song on the radio was Buffalo Soldier by Bob Marley. I’ve listened to this song dozens of times, along with his other hits that get radio play (Jamming, Waiting in Vain, No Woman No Cry just to name a few). All of his songs have religious and political messages woven into their unmistakable melodies. And I think that the meaningful lyrical content is what’s made his music so enduring. Which is why it struck me as ironic that the next song on the radio was Margaritaville. While also an enduring classic, it felt odd to have a song about inequality and the struggle for identity and freedom followed by a song about the dangers of lounging on the beach. That’s not to say that one song is better than the other, I’ll leave that judgment up to you. But it seems to me that the message of Marley’s music is often overlooked for its mellow flow.

Not to get crazy with the conspiracy theories, but I feel like the tools of revolution have been highjacked by the entertainment industry. My impression of past eras is that music was the catalyst of change. It was something that could spark a cultural revolution. But then again, that impression might just be record company branding too.

But I digress. Music, like food, needs to be taken in with variety so it’s ok to mix categories. You shouldn’t just listen to Rage Against the Machine all day. You’ve got to sprinkle the Bee Gees in there and make sure to get some Radiohead too. The important part is that next time you hear Bob Marley, don’t just bob your head to the beat. Enjoy the music and sing along in your best Reggae accent, but while you are singing think about the lyrics. Think about the story Marley is telling you, and think about his characters. And then think about what it means to you.

Said he was a Buffalo Soldier win the war for America; Buffalo Soldier, Dreadlock Rasta, Fighting on arrival, fighting for survival; Driven from the mainland to the heart of the Caribbean

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix - Movie Review and Afterthoughts

2007-07-24T20:09:00.000-07:00

In my nerdbird household, the Harry Potter movies have become something of a tradition. Every couple of months we either track down an airing on cable or rent a copy. They are always a great distraction; something to chase away the Sunday blues. It should come as no surprise then when I say that we were pretty excited to see this latest installment on the big screen.

The opening scene looked like a Pink Floyd video. It had a dreamy quality, both familiar and unsettling. Sitting on a swing set, Harry looked the part of a frustrated young man stuck in a child's playground. Right on cue, his bloated, cross eyed cousin saunters into the picture, cronies in tow. I have to admit, that I didn't realize who this frumpy bully was supposed to be. I didn't recognize him from the earlier movies. Dudley, dressed like a pseudo hip hop fan, taunts Harry even going so far as to bring up Harry's dead mother. Jumping out of the swing, Harry steps up to his miserable cousin and points his wand under Dudley's chin. Not even two minutes into the movie and already I'm hooked in. I wanted to see Harry zap his cousin's insufferable head right off. But alas, Harry is a good boy. And he knows that with great power comes great responsibility. The funny thing is though, that in Harry's magical grasp, a pointed wand is just as good as a loaded gun. Heavy stuff.

Welcome to the Order

Early in the picture, Harry is introduced to the Order of the Phoenix. Consisting of many of the adult characters in the story, the Order is a motley bunch of wizards. Their hideout in London is a dusty apartment magically concealed from muggle eyes. The special effects reveal of the hideout reminded me of something Niel Gaiman would write.
When Harry enters the house, we see most of the recurrent characters conspiring around a dusty dining room table. They all share some secret that they don't want Harry to be in on. But rather than building suspense or mystery, this scene only annoys me by feeling forced. The saving grace of this story point is that we are re-introduced to Harry's godfather Sirius Black (coolly portrayed by the sometimes creepy but always electrifying Gary Oldman). In this movie, Sirius is not the ragamuffin refugee like he was in the third film. This time he looks like a rock star, he is the Jim Morrison of wizarding.

Accusations

In the opening scenes of the movie, Harry and his cousin are attacked by a pair of Dementors. Introduced in the third film, Dememtors look like the grim reaper and have the power to steal your life essence. They are supposed to be under the control of the Ministry of Magic and only used to hunt down wanted criminals.
Fighting for his life, Harry had no choice but to cast a Patronus Charm to drive the Dementors away. But using magic in front of normal humans is strictly forbidden and Harry is summonsed to a trial before the Ministry. Harry's accusal is the first sign of a conspiracy within the magical governing body. The trial itself is a trap of circular logic and legal inequity. Harry was defending himself from the Dementors who represent the will of the Ministry and therefore the Minister himself. Harry's trial defense then is that he was forced to use magic by the very same people that accuse him for it. The audience knows this to be the truth, but this is hardly an "acceptable" defense.
Among his accusers is Dolores Umbridge, Inquisitor of the Ministry. Played by Academy Award nominee Imelda Staunton, this character is like a wicked stepmother, perfectly cruel.
We also get a glimpse of the Department of Mysteries. With black gleaming tiles and Gothic chrome fixtures, if hell had an office, this is what is would look like.

Back to School

All magic and peril aside, Harry Potter is a story about special kids away at boarding school. At the end of summer break, Harry is reunited with his friends. Rupert Grint and Emma Watson (Ron & Hermione) have, just like Daniel Radcliffe, grown from adorable brats into handsome young adults (here's to hoping they don't become friends with Paris, though they are probably contractually obligated to avoid her).
We also meet new student, Luna Lovegood. Played by series newcomer Evanna Lynch, the ethereal Luna is a flower child of a wizard. With cornsilk hair and an airy voice, she is a weird and welcome addition to the class. Through her interactions with Harry, we see that he is becoming spiritually darker as he has witnessed death.

Throughout the series, Harry's notoriety has kept him at a distance from his classmates. At times he is admired for his natural talents, and at other times he is derided for those same skills. The events of the last film have driven the wedge between Harry and the other students even further. He is accused of lying about the death of Cedric Diggory at the hands of the resurrected Lord Voldemort. The "Daily Prophet" magical newspaper smears propaganda against both Harry and his most ardent supporter, Hogwart's headmaster Albus Dumbledore. Again a tool of the Ministry is used to attack Harry...this is not going to be a good year for him.

The story proceeds at a slow pace. Of all the movies thus far, The Order of the Phoenix has the least amount of plot events. But the strengths of this film lie in how it brings the series to a darker, more consequential place. The machinations of the Ministry of Magic are undeniably Orwellian. As the Inquisitor of the Ministry, Dolores Umbridge subjects the students to magical forms of self abuse and brain washing. She administers harsh truth serums to unlock their minds. This is heavy subject matter for a family film, but is an excellent emotional hook into a story that could be easily dismissed as juvenile fiction.

Harry's connection to Voldemort is further explored in this story. Stemming from the events of Harry's childhood when Voldemort attempted to kill him, Harry has an almost telepathic bond with the villain, sharing thoughts and powers. Professor Snape tries to teach Harry the art of Occlumency, a technique whereby one can close one's mind to invasion. Harry's sessions with Snape accidentally reveal an interesting chapter in the youth of both Snape and Harry's deceased father. Through Snape's memories, Harry sees an unexpected scene of his father bullying a young version of the professor. Harry is understandably shaken as he realizes that his father may not have been the kind saint that he is in Harry's mind. To me this scene underscores that transitional realization we all have that the mental pictures of our youth are skewed from what we see as adults. When we are kids, people and places seem so much bigger than they really are.

Enter the Dragon

The buildup and the events of this movie are slower than the ones before it. The mysteries and
reveals are sometimes too subtle to have much emotional punch. But the final scenes of the story are some of the most intense displays of magic on film. Lord Voldemort has been drawn out of hiding. His pack of Death Eaters have bared their fangs. The soldiers of the Order of the Phoenix are prepared to battle the darkness and stem the spread of evil that is corrupting the Ministry of Magic. And stumbling right into the middle of the fight are Harry and "Dumbledore's Army". In this story, the students take it upon themselves to learn the combative aspects of magic that they are denied by the Ministry. They choose Harry as their instructor since he has had the most experience with almost getting killed.
I won't belabor the final confrontation with a blow by blow except to say that it was an awesome display. Magic wands can easily come off as corny, but they managed to stay out of the realm of silly. One thing I do want to note specifically is that there is a match between elemental magics, fire and water, that totally gets me psyched for the possibilities of the upcoming movie version of Avatar the Last Airbender (if you haven't seen this show, run don't walk!)

Final Thoughts

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix was not the best of the movie series. It lacks the adventure of the other films in favor something that I would describe as dark fantasy. It moves the series away from being a kids' movie and that's not necessarily a bad thing, but serious movies just aren't as fun. Personally I was satisfied with the action. For my money, the climax of the picture more than made up for the earlier slow points. The deeper character elements are a welcome addition, specifically Harry having to redefine himself not as a precocious kid but as a young man who bears the responsibility of his choices. In this way it seems like the series is trying to grow up with its viewers.

It is unfortunate that Ron and Hermione took a back seat in this story. I was disappointed to see them used more as set dressing than as plot drivers. Hopefully the next installment will once again focus on their friendship.

Making good movies out of beloved books is a tough business. I suspect that more than a few weak plot points would be fleshed out by having read the book first. But alas, I have not read any of the series. There are so many hours in a day and so many media to consume. Besides, why read the book when you can watch the movie?

Transformers Movie (2007) Review

2007-07-17T13:28:00.000-07:00

A week ago I went to see the Transformers movie and have been agonizing over what to say about it. Like so many other people I have mixed feelings about the whole experience. If I took a step back from it and tried to imagine this as an original movie about an original concept then I would say that it was a solid summer movie. It had enough action and comedy to make it a fun time with just the usual shortcomings of a few slow spots and a couple of chill inducing cheesy lines. There were a some logical inconsistencies (standard scifi pitfalls), but it was not billed as a smart, edgy thriller, but as a rockin’ good time…and that’s exactly what it was.

But looking at the movie as a big screen version of an icon from my childhood gets a little more complicated. It was hard not to compare it to the original movie. The original movie was the culmination of a series that already laid the groundwork for the story. The new movie should therefore be compared to the first few episodes of the series. In that light, I am able to cut it a lot more slack and just take for what it was, one of the coolest scifi/action movies in a long time.

In the interest of being brief, I am going to rattle off, bullet style, my list of pros and cons about the picture:

Pro: Bumblebee. In the cartoon, Bumblebee had a lot of heart and charm but was by no means a badass. This incarnation of the little yellow Autobot is 10x’s cooler and tougher than the original. From his hand cannon to the choice of making him a camaro, the new Bumblebee rocks! One of my favorite moments in the movie was when he was released after being “probed” and he flipped down his blast visor, ready to blow someone up:

Con: Dialogue. While this is obviously over dramatic material, some of the lines (particularly Optimus Prime’s) were way too hokey, distractingly so.

Pro: Transforming. No need to explain this one.

Con: When the Autobots were clinging to the outside of the observatory. There was an audience wide chuckle at this scene.

Pro: Autobots matrix style combat…Ironhide’s blast assisted flip, Awesome!!

Con: Lack of character development among the actual transformers…but this should be remedied in the inevitable sequel.

I will end my picking of nits here. Bottom line it was a fun movie and that’s all that really matters!

New Site Related to JJ Abrams Cloverfield (1/18/08)?

2007-07-11T18:50:00.000-07:00

I have never been a party to one of the ARG/Viral marketing campaigns before, so I was excited to see (and subsequently Google) this enigmatic trailer. Like a lot of people, I thought the guy screaming in the background said "Lion", so I was definitely thinking Voltron. Not that it made much sense but hey, I was about to watch Transformers, so it wasn't such a stretch.

Google led me to Wikipedia...Wikipedia to 1-18-08.com and ethanhaaswasright.com. Google then led me to ethanhaas.org (which doesn't follow with what was posted about JJ Abrams's email to Ain't It Cool News).

Just to see if I could pick out any new details from the trailer, I watched it on Apple's website. I was staring at the flying Statue of Liberty head in slow motion when i noticed it...a license plate number. On a black SUV, there is the license plate ABZ 3293. So, like a good citizen, I googled it and wouldn't you know www.abz3293.com is a real site. A real site that mentions a black SUV. Check it out. And I promise a review of Transformers too.

Movie Review - 1408

2007-06-26T17:58:00.000-07:00

In the year 1408, King Sigismund of Hungary founded the fabled Order of the Dragon. This year also saw the completion of what was then the largest known general compendium of knowledge, the Chinese Yongle Encyclopedia. I learned this all on Wikipedia. And it has nothing to do with the movie I saw earlier today.

As is revealed in the promotional trailers, the movie 1408 is based on a Stephen King short story by the same name. That is a spooky pedigree, so I entered the theater with fairly high hopes. It has been a while since I’ve seen a decent scary movie, and the recent glut of over the top horror doesn’t do it for me. I need a good story and an emotional hook to pull me along with whatever is moving the characters. So a movie based on a Stephen King story about a haunted room, starring one of my favorite actors seems like a good bet.

The movie literally begins on a dark and stormy night. Mike Enslin (John Cusack) is on his way to a haunted hotel in the middle of nowhere. He is a writer with a well-received series of haunted travel guides (10 Haunted Hotels, 10 Haunted Graveyards, etc). Early on, it is clear that he is a non believer and that his writing is not a work of passion, but just a job. (As an aspiring writer, I always have a soft spot for movies about writers -Wonderboys and Almost Famous come to mind)

After a few establishing scenes showing his solitary lifestyle, Enslin receives a postcard from the Dolphin Hotel in New York City with the message “Do not enter room 1408”. Being a quick thinking cynic, Enslin adds up the digits to equal 13. Intrigued by this clever turn, he calls the hotel to book the room. The phone clerk refuses the request and hangs up on him. Now totally baited, Enslin contacts his publisher for research and legal assistance. Armed with the advice that due to nondiscrimination laws in NYC an unoccupied hotel room cannot be refused to a paying customer, he arrives at the Dolphin and calmly demands his room.

This is when we meet the hotel manager, Mr. Olin, played by Samuel L. Jackson. I have mixed feelings about Jackson as an actor. Sometimes he is the coolest, baddest mofo on the screen and other times he comes off as simply out of place. He always seems to be playing himself, so I think I will blame his misses on the director and the casting department. In this role though, he nails it.

With polite sarcasm, Enslin demands to be allowed the key to room 1408. With polite menace, Mr. Olin resists, offering the room’s grisly history of madness and death. Recognizing Enslin’s stubbornness, Mr. Olin throws up two potent obstacles: expensive booze and a dossier of the room’s storied past. Enslin will not be deterred. He unceremoniously accepts both bribes and convinces Mr. Olin to give him the key.

What follows is a mixed back of genuine fright an overproduced flash. If you haven’t seen the movie yet, stop here and just know that I was under whelmed and didn’t end up in a shock-induced stupor like I hoped. But it did have some really good ideas mixed in.

If you have seen the movie, let’s pick at it a little and see what spooky juice we can extract (that was gross huh?)

The first steps into madness begin with the mysterious turndown service. When Enslin is not looking, chocolates appear on the pillow and the toilet paper is neatly refolded. This is good stuff, quick and tricky hits that are in no way supernatural but shouldn’t have occurred. Then continuing in the vein of simple things that can freak you out, the window, seemingly with a will of its own, slams on Enslin’s hand. A normal injury, horrible yes, spooky no. This is how you build psychotic tension. With his blood smeared on the walls and shower curtain, Enslin tries to call the front desk. The saccharine pre-scripted phone clerk- a whole other brand of horror- offers no help. Shouting out the window in desperation, he notices a man sitting in an apartment across the street. Waving his arms frantically, Enslin watches as the man who seemed to notice his plight begin to mimic Enslin’s own movements. Slowly he gestures, the man across the street gesturing in tandem. Straining to see the man’s shadow obscured face he lifts the table lamp to reveal that the man across the street is in fact a reflection of himself. I don’t know if there is an implied subtext of an other self refusing to help (Enslin is a self destructive character), but this is the first true vision of the supernatural forces at work in the room.

Suddenly, Enslin jumps back in shock as a crazed slasher bursts into the reflected view. This maniac looks like he is ready to be the new Jason or Freddy with his electrified hair and frenetic attack. Besides the visceral terror of this butcher, I was hoping for some sort of connection, some thread to give the character meaning. But unfortunately, even though he appeared again later, there was no connection to be made.

At this point in the movie, there is a genuine, scary thrill building. But the moment for me when my enjoyment and suspense began to fall apart was the scene showing the room’s first victims, the suicides. It was a neat special effect showing the miserable specters as a piece of black and white and Technicolor film. But the effects totally broke my link to the scene; it cut the wires that were suspending my disbelief. Up until this point, everything that was happening was “real”. But this effect and subsequent effects (the frosty room, the flood) all did the story an injustice.

The best scenes in the movie, while surreal, did not overuse special effects. When Enslin tries to escape the room, I did have a few moments of edge-of-my-seat suspense. The first attempt is through the ventilation duct. Preying on everyone’s claustrophobic tendencies, this scene shows

Enslin crawling headfirst through a roach infested labyrinth barely larger than his body. Inevitably a freak show character pops out from behind him to drive him back into the room. After gracefully dropping out of the ceiling vent, we get a brief respite of comic relief. With a hairdo reminiscent of a ruffled parakeet, Enslin wheezes, “That’s enough of that.”

His second attempt is to shimmy across the face of the building to the adjacent room’s window. Pacing off the distance, he measures 18 feet. Slowly, step by step he begins to traverse the distance. With his face pressed against the brick he moves across the ledge… 16… 17… 18… reaching with his lead hand, groping for the window frame he discovers the maddening power of the room…there is no window. There is only an unending expanse of brick and ledge. In an agoraphobic nightmare sequence, he retreats, narrowly returning to the incongruous safety of the room. Lying on his back he looks at the hotel diagram on the door. Moments earlier, this same diagram that gave him the idea to enter the room next door now shows a solid black building with only one room dead center with the simple phrase “you are here”. The terror of this scene is perfect. When he’s on the ledge, you know what is going to happen; you know the window won’t be there. But it is still scary because now he has to overcome the very base human fear of heights. This combination of an unseen supernatural force driving him to natural danger is where the movie works best.

The last engaging scene of the movie is Enslin being reunited with his deceased daughter. At first sight, she looks like a little demon in disguise. A freckled ragamuffin walking barefoot through glass and ash is at the same time repulsive and heart breaking. When Enslin embraces this ghost made of flesh, we assume that this is another trick of the room. We expect him to be holding the freak from the air vent or some other monster. But in a cruel turn, his daughter dies again in his arms. Just as before, this is a very real terror. Enslin’s pain and anguish ring far truer than any scream queen’s shriek at the sight of a bloody ghoul.

In the final scene, when Enslin plays his tape recorder we hear his daughter’s voice. Horror movies, whether psychological or slasher, are built on the concept that madness lies just below the surface of our normal lives. In the beginning of the movie, we are safely above the surface going about our business until something reaches up to ensnare us in terror. In the end, the surface is calm; the terror subsided. I always appreciate a story that takes one last jab to remind us that the madness is still down there, waiting. Enslin’s wife is understandably horrified. She has to deal with a frightening reality that he has been trying to convince himself was only a dream. In that last scene, it almost seems as though there is the subtlest smile on Mike Enslin’s face. I was satisfied with that ending and it looked like he was too.

Review - Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer (Yet another summer letdown)

2007-05-31T10:52:00.000-07:00

I am a comic book liker. I’m not a fan, since “fan” comes from “fanatic”, and that’s not me. When I was in seventh grade, I started collecting comic books. My favorite marvel titles were Erik Larsen’s Spiderman, Rob Leifeld’s New Mutants (and later X-Force), Jim Lee’s X-men (it’s easy to see the pattern that I was in it for the art). At best I was “really into” comics. I regularly spent my allowance, and later my pitiful paychecks, on them and could probably hang with greater geeks in conversations that didn’t wander too deeply into abstract canon. All that said rest assured that I enter into this review, not as a raving fanboy, but simply as an average moviegoer well versed in the source material.

After a mildly exciting intro, showing the world shattering effects of the Silver Surfer, the movie quickly fell in to a boring, predictable pace. The jokes were stale and the character dynamics were just more of the same. I would go so far as to say that the first act of the movie came off like an ineffectual superhero comedy.

Fast forward to act two. The Silver Surfer crashes the fantastically trite wedding to offer the first excitement of the story, and the first good joke: as the surfer rockets over head, Mr. Fantastic turns to Johnny Storm to follow the new threat.
Mr. Fantastic (exasperated): “Johnny!”
Johnny (reluctant, tugging at his tuxedo lapels): “But this is Dolce”.

The chase scene between Johnny and the Surfer was awesome. When the Surfer phases through the Chrysler Building and comes out the other side in slow motion, posed on his board looking like a cosmic version of a Michelangelo, I got chills.
Throughout the following acts, it is clear that the Silver Surfer is damn cool. He is a man of few words and many powers. The actor chosen to voice the surfer is no stranger to playing an imposing, enigmatic hero. And in this case, the type casting paid off. The character was so intriguing, that I would have preferred to see a movie set in the deep dark reaches of space called: “Rise of the Silver Surfer”.

One scene in particular had the potential of being truly memorable. When the Invisible Woman finally has a chance to learn about the Surfer’s origin, the camera pans down to the Surfers silver torso. His metallic skin fades to show a celestial tableau illustrating the destructive horror of his cosmic master. But instead of a comic book inspired flashback to draw us into the lonely plight of the intergalactic wanderer, we are only shown a loop of the opening images of the film.

The last chance for this movie to really wow the audience was the reveal of the film’s Big Bad. The Silver Surfer is the Herald of Galactus; a devourer of worlds, the scourge of galaxies unknown to mankind. Galactus has set his sights on earth, and fans can’t wait to see the cosmic-god brought to glory on the 2-story screen. But here is the film’s final disappointment. In the comic books, Galactus is literally larger than life. He is humanoid in appearance (especially to humans) but with the stature of Mount Olympus itself. However the filmmakers chose instead to make Galactus appear as a storm twice the size of earth. If this movie were about a cosmic debris storm hurtling through our solar system, then this effect would have been superb. But in the context of this movie, I can’t help but feel that it was a cop out, a way to save on the sfx budget. The storm robbing Saturn of its dusty rings was an exciting touch, but it didn’t compare to the disappointment of seeing an omnipotent villain portrayed as a sentient cloud of debris.

The end of the movie was predictable: the heroes saved the day. But they didn’t save me from boredom.